Was I ready for Marriage???

Was I ready for marriage? This is the question that I asked myself once L asked to marry me. Sometimes we don't ask ourselves these type of important questions when we are making major life decisions. Everyone knows I have a 9 year old daughter. Before I was pregnant with her, I neglected to ask myself the question about if I was ready to be a parent. I don't live my life in regret of not asking myself that question. I now know I wasn't ready to be a parent. And sure as heck wasn't ready to be a single parent. After my daughter was born I was in a four year bad relationship. In 2008 I got enough courage to finally take my daughter and leave and never look back. From that moment on, I realized I couldn't just make decisions and not really think about them. I couldn't just date anyone and not take into account the questions that rattled in my head. I had to answer them. I had to do this for not only myself but my daughter as well. When L proposed he was in a prison that is located in Michigan. I had traveled there to stay the weekend so that I could see him. We sat and talked for a while but before he popped the question, he asked some really important questions. Some of the questions he asked, I had previously asked myself and some of them I didn't think to ask myself. All in all, the questions that were asked and answered are similar to what I think a lot of people should ask before they say "Yes". Your probably sitting there reading this and wanting to know the questions that he asked me. I won't tell you all of them. Maybe not any of them. Not that I don't want to tell them to you. But isn't everyones situation different? What works for me may not work for you. Things that I care about, may not bother you. While there may be some similarities, it would still be considered to be different. Ask yourself some of these questions. 1. Are you ready to give up saying "Me" or "I" and start saying "We" or "Us"??? 2. (Ladies) Are you ready to take your pants off and actually let this man in front of you be the Man of the household??? 3. (Men) Are you prepared to be the Man of the household??? Three easy questions right?? Wrong. Anyway can answer these questions but it takes a real Man/Woman to be able to answer and apply. Our questions were different because of course L is in prison so I had to really think about what I was agreeing to do and if I could truley handle it. I also had to think about my past. What did I learn from it? Was I able to seriously leave the past in the past? Was I able to figure out what I could have done wrong in my past relationships and correct them so to not do the same thing in this new relationship? I needed to know if I could not think about just myself. But could I actually be the wife the L needed me to be? You see, most people get the questions mixed up when marriage comes up. Instead of asking questions about your life together, you ask questions about the actual "wedding day". What my dress is gonna look like or where we going to have the reception...When I was little I pictured what my whole wedding day would be like. But when L asked me to marry him, not one time did any of that matter to me. I was excited that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Thats when I knew that me saying yes was the right thing to do and that I wouldn't regret it. I didn't think once about where our wedding would be held or what my dress would look like. All I could think about was I couldn't wait to be a great wife to this man. People ask me all the time how I felt marrying my husband while he is on the inside. My wedding day was the happiest day of my life. Right there next to the day I had my daughter. I don't regret one thing about it. I included my thoughts and questions about my daughter being involved in this. Which I didn't do before with my old relationship. I asked my daughter how she felt about me marrying L. I asked her what she thought of him. I asked her if she wanted to be there. I included her in making the plans and she even sang a little song. I had fun and my cheeks hurted from smiling so much that day. All I could think about is the wonderful and funny life we are going to have together. It hasn't been long. But we are going strong. And yes, I wake up every morning thanking God for the life I was given and the way that it was given to me. Answering those questions that were rattling my head made me be able to know that I was ready for marriage. I wasn't guessing and I didn't have any reserves about it. This led me to go into my marriage without all the "what if's"... This is just my opinion. I am no expert on marriage. Me and L learn every single day what it takes to have a striving and working marriage. And we plan to continue to learn from one another. Thank you for reading and sharing.