Pros and Cons

Lots of people thought that me and L's relationship was doomed once he was transfered out of state to Michigan. We as a couple really didn't know what to expect either. We were still very new to all of this and still trying to find our way through all the mess. It wasn't easy and it did take time to adjust to all the new rules and regulations and we also had to figure out how to make our relationship work through this extra long distanced relationship.

So once I was back from Michigan, it hit me that I had to wait three long months before I would see L again. I was glad that I was able to make the long trip to see him for the weekend and we were able to talk about our plans for the future. Our relationship was already not a easy one so with this transfer it made it a lot harder. But we both were determined to survive it.

We started to learn that there were some Pros and Cons to him being in Michigan. The first one was that we were able to talk a whole lot more then when he was in Pa. When he was in Pa, we were only able to talk maybe 2 or 3 times a week. But with him being in Michigan and with their calling guidelines and prices, we were able to talk to each other 2 to 3 times a day if not more. So even though he was further away from me, we felt closer to one another. He was also able to call me up until 11:30pm. Which was different because in Pa he was only able to call up until 8:15pm. The extra phone time allowed us to share more about the way that we felt about everything. We would have some really good conversations when he was in Michigan. We would set aside certain days for us to tell something that the other didn't know yet. We would use four phone calls to talk about it. That was our way of keeping things interesting. We did that at least once a week.

We also realized that the mail was different. Since there wasn't as many inmates in this facility as there was in any of the Pa facilities, they only had one person in the mail room. So if I sent a letter to L on monday morning, he wasn't due to get it until Friday or Saturday. Even with the Jpay letters which arrive at the facility the next day, they would still take 2 to 3 days to reach him. That was a pain to get used to. Not to mention, that L was only allowed to send out 10 letters a month. Yes, they counted. I hated that part but I was happy that it was me, his fiance that was getting those 10 letters.

L started to like it in Michigan. He liked the respect that the COs had for them there. They didn't give the inmates any problems until the inmates gave them problems. This allowed for the inmates to relax more and do what they were sent there to do....their time. L was able to concentrate more on his release and work towards any of the goals that he had without worrying about how he was mistreated or the thought of getting sent to the Box for speaking his mind.

I personally liked L being in Michigan. I would have rathered him stay there then to come back to Pa. Yes, I missed him dearly and wanted to be able to visit every month like we were use to but knowing that L was safe and able to finish his time smoothly was a better feeling to me then for me to be able to see him all the time. L of course loved being there but wanted to come back to Pa to be closer to me. But after some time of me and L coming up with solutions to making everything better for us, he was convinced that this was a good decision. The downside to Michigan was me traveling so far to go see him. But L will tell you in a second that me traveling to Michigan that first time was how he knew I was serious about our relationship. And that made him fall even more in love with me then he already was. Which was fine with me.

So there we were making Michigan work for us and planning another trip for me to visit in February. Michigan worked for us. We MADE it work. We put all the good and the bad on a scale and it actually turned out that all of the good outwieghed the bad, which was another good thing about Michigna. Then the whole talk about our wedding came up and thats a whole other story to be told another day lol.

Thanks for reading....